Hello everyone! Are you curious about witchcraft and interested in finding out which type of witch you are? Well, you're in luck! Today, we're going to discuss a witchcraft test that can help you discover your witch type. Witchcraft, as many of you may know, is the practice of magic and the manipulation of energy to achieve desired outcomes. There are different types of witches, each with their own unique set of skills and abilities. By taking this test, you can gain insight into your witch type and the specific qualities that make you who you are. Before we begin, it's important to note that these tests are not definitive or absolute. They are simply tools to help you explore and learn more about yourself.
Daniel adds, “Men are providers. Men are protectors. You know that’s true, Naomi.” Sarah and James try not to get involved in this back-and-forth battle of the sexes between Daniel and Naomi. However, Sarah and James occasionally get dragged into the squabbling between Daniel and Naomi, when Naomi scolds Sarah about being too submissive in her relationship with Daniel, and Daniel taunts James for being too much of a pushover in his relationship with Naomi.
The four people on this ill-fated trip are cocky Daniel played by AJ Jones ; his mild-mannered wife Sarah played by Gillie Jones, also known as Gillie Fitz ; combative Naomi played by Najah Bradley ; and Naomi s laid-back boyfriend James played by Patrick R. The Curse of La Patasola is yet another unimaginative horror movie that takes place in an isolated wooded area, where people have terror inflicted on them by an evil spirit.
They are simply tools to help you explore and learn more about yourself. With that being said, let's dive in! First and foremost, one test you can take is the astrology-based witchcraft test. This test analyzes your birth chart, which is a personalized map of the sky at the exact time and location of your birth.
Review: ‘The Curse of La Patasola,’ starring Najah Bradley, AJ Jones, Gillie Jones, Patrick R. Walker and Luciana Faulhaber
Culture Representation: Taking place in a fictional U.S. area called Bear Lake and briefly in Colombia, the horror film “The Curse of La Patasola” features a cast of white, African American and Latino characters representing the working-class and middle-class.
Culture Clash: Two couples spend a night camping in an isolated wooded area, where they encounter a vengeful evil spirit.
Culture Audience: “The Curse of La Patasola” will appeal mainly to people who don’t mind watching mindless, boring and predictable horror movies.
Gillie Jones and AJ Jones in “The Curse of La Patasola” (Photo courtesy of Vertical Entertainment)
“The Curse of La Patasola” is yet another unimaginative horror movie that takes place in an isolated wooded area, where people have terror inflicted on them by an evil spirit. There are absolutely no surprises in this horrendously dull, amateurish movie, which doesn’t get to any real horror until the last 20 minutes of this 84-minute film. Until then, viewers of “The Curse of La Patasola” will have to sit through scene after scene that get dragged down with monotonous repetition of two couples and their individual bickering/relationship problems.
AJ Jones, one of the co-stars of “The Curse of La Patasola,” makes his feature-film directorial debut with this movie. Jones co-wrote the very flimsy and uninteresting screenplay with Shaun Mathis. The filmmakers of “The Curse of La Patasola” seem to have little to no understanding that if you’re going to do the over-used horror concept of “terror in the woods,” you better come up with something original and well-written instead of doing a sloppy rehash of so many other low-budget horror flicks that have the exact same concept.
Even worse: The “scares” in “The Curse of La Patasola” are very few and far in between. The acting is mediocre-to-bad, while a lot of the dialogue sounds phony and awkward. And there’s barely enough in the story to fill a short film. It’s why the movie stretches out and spends most of its screen time on relationship drama between the two couples who’ve decided to take a camping trip together in this remote wooded area called Bear Lake in an unnamed U.S. state. (“The Curse of La Patasola” was actually filmed in Clermont, Florida.)
The four people on this ill-fated trip are cocky Daniel (played by AJ Jones); his mild-mannered wife Sarah (played by Gillie Jones, also known as Gillie Fitz); combative Naomi (played by Najah Bradley); and Naomi’s laid-back boyfriend James (played by Patrick R. Walker). From the beginning of the trip, when they’re driving into the woods, Daniel and Naomi start clashing and do most of the arguing.
Here’s an example of the type of dialogue between Daniel and Naomi: Daniel says, “I’m not saying I’m anti-feminist. I’m saying that some feminists take it too far. Men have screwed up some history, sure. But Eve ate the apple first.” Naomi is offended by Daniel’s comments, but she’s ready to do verbal battle with Daniel. “Overconfident mansplaining is my favorite dish to feed on,” Naomi smirks in response. Who talks like that? Only militant feminists in badly written movies.
Daniel adds, “Men are providers. Men are protectors. You know that’s true, Naomi.” Sarah and James try not to get involved in this back-and-forth battle of the sexes between Daniel and Naomi. However, Sarah and James occasionally get dragged into the squabbling between Daniel and Naomi, when Naomi scolds Sarah about being too submissive in her relationship with Daniel, and Daniel taunts James for being too much of a pushover in his relationship with Naomi.
This type of bickering goes on and on for too much of the movie. Viewers will learn nothing about the backstories of these four people except that Daniel is unemployed and has been struggling for two or three years to start his own business; Sarah has gotten tired of Daniel’s stalled career and wants Daniel to get a job so she can go to nursing school; and Daniel and James have been friends since high school, where Daniel seduced one of James’ love interests on at least one occasion.
Later in the movie, when Naomi and Sarah have some private time together and smoke some marijuana, Naomi confesses that she’s gotten bored with James because he’s too nice for her, and she’ll probably break up with him after this camping trip. Naomi makes this cringeworthy comment about her relationship with James: “I thought we’d be yin and yang, but it’s more like yin and yawn.” Naomi doesn’t know it yet, but James is going to propose marriage to her on this trip. Is this a horror movie or cheesy soap opera?
On the way to the camping area, a park ranger (played by Mark Pettit) stopped the car to warn these four travelers that there have recently been strange occurrences at Bear Lake, such as missing people and reports of terrifying noises. Around the campfire that night, Naomi tells the story she heard from her Colombian grandmother about the ghost of a vengeful woman called La Patasola. As legend has it, La Patasola was unfaithful to her husband, who caught her in the act of infidelity. He chopped off her leg and left her to die, and then he murdered their children.
As a cursed spirit, La Patasola haunts wooded areas and gets revenge on unfaithful men by murdering them while possessing the bodies of unfaithful women. She inhabits these bodies because La Patasola is really a grotesque creature in her true form. The movie’s opening scene takes place in Colombia and shows an unidentified couple during a nighttime tryst in the woods and having an obvious encounter with La Patasola. The woman (played by Daniela Gonzalez) is a wife and mother, but she’s not married to the lover who’s with her in the woods.
During an amorous moment, the man (played by Jack Young) tells her: “Your husband doesn’t love you the way I love you.” And then, he hears another woman’s voice nearby saying multiple times, “Come find me,” so he leaves his lover to investigate in the part of the woods where he thinks he hears the voice. It’s easy to guess that happens next when the man can be heard screaming in the distance. Luciana Faulhaber has the movie’s role of La Patasola, which basically just has her walking around in a white dress and trying to look mysterious. Any monster visual effects in the movie just aren’t very impressive.
It’s also very easy to predict who will be the cheating partners on this camping trip and everything that happens after that. And if it isn’t obvious enough, the trailer for “The Curse of La Patasola” essentially gives away the movie’s entire stale plot, except for some of the gruesome scenes. And that’s why watching “The Curse of La Patasola” is ultimately a complete waste of time.
Vertical Entertainment released “The Curse of La Patasola” in select U.S. cinemas, on digital and VOD on January 14, 2022.
By examining the alignments of the planets and other celestial bodies, astrologers can determine your personality traits, strengths, and weaknesses, and how they relate to witchcraft. The insights gained from this test can help you identify which type of witch you may resonate with the most. Another popular witchcraft test is the elemental test. In this test, you will explore the different elements of nature – earth, air, fire, and water. By examining your affinity for each element, you can gain a deeper understanding of your connection to nature and the specific magical practices that align with your elemental strengths. The third test we will discuss is the intuitive test. This test focuses on your intuition and psychic abilities. By answering a series of questions about your intuitive experiences and abilities, you can gain insight into whether you are more aligned with being a psychic witch, a divination witch, or another type of witch that relies heavily on their intuition for spellcasting and magical workings. Lastly, we have the affinity test. This test evaluates your affinity towards different types of magic and witchcraft practices. By exploring your interests and preferences, you can discover which type of witchcraft resonates with you the most. For example, you may find that you are drawn to herbalism, potion making, or spellcasting with candles. This test can help you narrow down your witch type based on your personal preferences. In conclusion, discovering your witch type can be an exciting journey of self-discovery. Witchcraft tests can provide valuable insights and help you navigate the world of magic. However, it's important to remember that these tests are just a starting point and that your witchcraft journey is unique to you. Embrace your strengths, explore different practices, and most importantly, trust your intuition. Happy witchcraft exploring!.
Reviews for "Witchcraft Test: Unlock Your Mystical Potential and Determine Your Witch Type"
- John - 2 stars - I was really excited to take the Witchcraft test to find my witch type, but I was extremely disappointed with the results. The questions were too vague and didn't give me a clear understanding of what my witch type could be. The descriptions for each type were also very generic and didn't provide any in-depth information. Overall, I feel like I wasted my time taking this test as it didn't provide me with any valuable insights or guidance on my witchcraft journey.
- Sarah - 1 star - This witchcraft test was a complete letdown. The questions were incredibly basic and didn't touch on any important aspects of witchcraft. The results I received were also completely off-base and didn't align with my own beliefs and practices. The descriptions for each witch type were overly simplified and didn't provide any meaningful information. I wouldn't recommend this test to anyone serious about learning and exploring witchcraft.
- Michael - 2 stars - I took the Witchcraft test hoping to gain some clarity on my witch type, but I was left feeling confused and unsatisfied. The questions were quite ambiguous and didn't capture the complexity of witchcraft practices. The descriptions for each witch type felt like they were copied and pasted from a generic website, lacking any personal touch or insight. Overall, I wouldn't recommend this test to anyone looking for a genuine and accurate understanding of their witch type.