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Hi Sonja Its okay to not want to get back together with him right now or ever. Dont feel guilty about it and certainly dont feel like you need to decide right now on what you want to do with your life and or your marriage. I suggest you take some time to yourself to figure things out. When the time is right you will know where you stand. Clearly your husband has a lot of issues he needs to deal with and its better if you let him sort it out by himself. For one, it will give him a taste of life without you. If that is what he truly wants, you need to learn to accept it and let it go. The only person you have total control over is yourself. Focus on getting yourself better. You’re strong on your own and whatever it is that you’re going through right now is temporary. Nothing in life is permanent. A few months/ years down the line you will look back at this time and will be forever thankful for what it has brought your life. I went through a similar experience a few years back and now looking back at it all, I can’t help but thank my stars for everything I went through. Like I said life has a way of unraveling itself. There is a reason why things fell apart Sonja…. You may not see it now but one day it will all make sense 🙂
Me thinking something was off just made me walk on egg shells because I was worried I would upset him He even staged a business trip and went away with his single guyfriends during a time when I was sick and had to stay with my parents after I came home. Now, I prefer to be a skeptic of paranormal occurrences; I m an agnostic yet can t help feeling something divine but specifically demonic force is punishing cursing me.
It's essential to approach such material with an open mind and respectfully engage with the subject matter. These eBooks often aim to inform and educate readers about witchcraft, dispelling common misconceptions and promoting a positive understanding of this ancient practice. They may provide insights into its rich history and the significance of nature, as well as explain the importance of connecting with the elements and harnessing energy.
Why am i curded
I’ve been married for 3 years and been with my husband for over 5 years – the man who I thought was the love of my life and the future father of my children (don’t have any yet). I uncovered slowly over the course of this year an incredible amount of lies. It has been a painful process for me because I literally had to uncover the lies like a detective.
It started with 2 trips being booked behind my back (while I was away for a month) and charged to a creditcard that I didn’t know existed and paid out of an account I didn’t know existed either. The trips were with single guys (who he had all of a sudden befriended when I left the country). He spent an enormous amount of money on alcohol, clubs, pool parties etc. My husband picked up women and got their phone numbers as he pretended to be a “single” guy (I found this out through phone records and even spoke to one of the women), partying and clubbing and drinking on weeknights behind my back, again staged as work socials. Keep in mind he is 30 years old. All along I was out of the country studying in a 3rd world country completely oblivious to what he was up to. We kept in touch while I was away with emails and loving phone calls I could NEVER tell something this drastic was going on behind my back…. After I returned back home I could tell he was acting strangely (but I couldn’t put my finger on it so I just felt so crazy inside), my intuition just kept telling me something is really off. Me thinking something was off just made me walk on egg shells because I was worried I would upset him… He even staged a business trip and went away with his single guyfriends during a time when I was sick and had to stay with my parents after I came home. He got caught and that’s when I had to start investigating. The stress of this year started causing physical problems and nagging health issues for me. I’m very energy sensitive so emotional problems manifest into physical problems for me. The worst was after I uncovered all of the above I then found out that he had an affair with an old ex, all while I was out of the country. The sad part is this woman knew he was married and married to me. I am surprised women can be so cruel to their own kind. Now that everything has come to light he is begging to stay with me and wants to “change”. He claims he wasn’t himself and that he felt unloved by me and that is what sparked all this behaviour. Does this make sense? Feeling unloved means you cheat on someone and lie to them? If you feel unloved does your partner not deserve to be communicated with? I’m so badly hurt I can’t stop crying. I’ve been crying for 4.5 months. Each day when I wake up I still think this is all a bad dream and how could this have happened to someone like me? Someone who is loyal and truthful. The trust is completely gone to say the least. How can someone you know and loved to death treat you like this? How can the person you sleep with and took vows with, someone that you considered family treat you with this type of disrespect? How does a person suddenly change like this after so many years of knowing them? My heart is not able to let go of him. It hurts very badly. Please help me…..
Hello Sonja!
I’m so sorry for what you’re going through… You’re in a difficult place right now but I want you to know that you will get through this! You are not cursed, your life is not cursed. Life has a strange way of unraveling itself you just have to have faith. Sometimes things fall apart for better things to come through. That being said you can’t blame yourself for what happened, you cant blame anyone for what happened. The only person you have total control over is yourself. You can and you will get through this. Here is a video one of my friends Mika from Loving boldly posted about infidelity in marriages and how to survive it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r1LaoRUdG4 Much love and light
hey Sonja,
I think you problem is not a serious one. This is a usual thing happening in nowadays life style. There are many reasons for it.But whatever may be the reason, we need to fix it. The main point is there is a quote that “If you seriously love someone, that person should feel free and he/she should have to think of you when he get a spare time from work etc. ” . So one need to behave and love in such a way that utmost pleasure and happiness is already with me and i dont have to wander any more to grab it. the solution to your issue is let us try a new life.Accept his apologies and give him a chance. Then love him whole heartily so that he cannot even look on another woman just for a fun as he will be criticized in his inner mind that he is doing wrong to his better half. Then also if he is not changing you no need to worry because, you are not loosing anything, only he looses a person who loves him whole heartily. So the point is lets begin with positive energy, think you are the super hero.All power is within you,.
Thank you Rashmi and Abhiand…
I will keep trying to remember to have faith in life. Someone told me that his ex that he had an affair with did blackmagic on him and that she is very dark energy? I knew of this woman before I met my husband and I never had a good vibe on her. I am not aware of what blackmagic is but the source who told me is very spiritual and I trust him. So this did spark my curiosity. That led me to believe that maybe I was in fact cursed. He also said that if he was drinking so much his aura field would have holes in them letting in negative energy and leading him on the wrong path. – This is a bit difficult to grasp and I cannot just forgive someone based on these “theories”…. Right now we are separated and don’t live together. Too much has happened where I can’t be myself with him so right at this moment “giving him another chance” is not happening. I do not know what the future holds but currently this isn’t the right time. Even after everything came out in the open regarding what he has done and he was caught red handed. He still continued to text messaging random women at late hours of the night for another month. So how seriously does he even want to remedy the situation? It clearly shows me that I’m really not that important. Or he isn’t taking this seriously. Of course these women have NO idea that he is married/separated. He no longer wears his wedding ring. When questioned he said he was drunk. I am confused why he is acting like a teenager when he is a 30 year old man! He is hanging around with the worst company (all single men)…. I don’t want to just “go back” and run the chance of messing up my entire life. Right now I do not have children and I have another shot at life. In a few more years with him I will not be in the same boat. I am just lost right now… My heart doesn’t want to give up on him but my mind is telling me to take care of my interests given what has happened. Also everyone around me is warning me to move on with my life without him….. If we are meant to be together he needs to “grow up” and “mature”. Do you think this is possible? If we are meant to be together will the universe/life allow for this?
I am so sorry this has happened to you. I can’t even imagine how you feel. I think you should move on…There is no excuse for what he did. If he did it once, I would consider another chance, but he did it more than once. I feel like the only reason he’s sorry is because he got caught. I know this doesn’t take the pain away, but in due time it will. I’m going through a breakup right now and it hurts like hell. I just keep telling myself that in due time the pain will be less and less. I will be so happy when the point comes. I will also be happy when that happens for you as well.
October 18, 2013 at 11:02 pm #44003 ParticipantHi Sonja Its okay to not want to get back together with him right now or ever. Dont feel guilty about it and certainly dont feel like you need to decide right now on what you want to do with your life and or your marriage. I suggest you take some time to yourself to figure things out. When the time is right you will know where you stand. Clearly your husband has a lot of issues he needs to deal with and its better if you let him sort it out by himself. For one, it will give him a taste of life without you. If that is what he truly wants, you need to learn to accept it and let it go. The only person you have total control over is yourself. Focus on getting yourself better. You’re strong on your own and whatever it is that you’re going through right now is temporary. Nothing in life is permanent. A few months/ years down the line you will look back at this time and will be forever thankful for what it has brought your life. I went through a similar experience a few years back and now looking back at it all, I can’t help but thank my stars for everything I went through. Like I said life has a way of unraveling itself. There is a reason why things fell apart Sonja…. You may not see it now but one day it will all make sense 🙂
October 19, 2013 at 5:15 am #44006 ParticipantWow, I had to respond to this one ! I am so sorry for your pain, and I went through feelings of the same nature in a previous relationship , due to the persons inability to think with his brain instead of his nether regions. It is painful, and causes feelings of anger, jealousy, feeling not good enough etc, but it will get better. The problem here is that, the person is being very self – centered, focusing on their own selfish wish for gratification and pleasure. They are not thinking of you, and how it feels for you, and even if he does – his mind sees his desires as more important. Once trust has been broken to this level – it is very very hard to get it back, and to even trust yourself again (which you will eventually) It gives us that icky feeling of not knowing what is true and what is not – its a truly horrible feeling, but you will find peace again. (try to meditate, bathe, use nice relaxing music,) Remind yourself that this is his issue – not yours. His side, his mess – and it has nothing to do with you. He made those choices (and the feeling unloved excuse is a low effort at trying to deflect from his own disgraceful behavior) I agree with love can conquer all, and that unconditional love is the ideal way to be, but in that context, the person has to really truly want to change, and to work with you . And on your side, you would have to forgive, and trust – which would be very hard in reality. For me I dont think I would be able to, even if I wanted to. I know I would never rest easy, or feel peaceful, as my human nature / logical side would say that if he has these tendencies, he may do it again. He went a few steps too far here, in my book. Secret credit cards, singles holidays, hook ups, and affairs with an ex ? He seems to have a boundary problem here – that is completely unacceptable in a monogamous relationship !! (what you thought was a monogamous one) You were doing your part – studying, working – and he seems to have been leading a double life ! Im really sorry if I sound hard hearted – but Im just really finding it hard to imagine trusting this person again. As for black magic – that is not true ! The only black magic here, was his own dark need to do just what he wanted in those moments of greed, and do as he pleased – without thinking of your pain, or of any concequences. You sound like a lovely person – and only you can decide, but whatever you decide – this is not about you. It wasnt just a mistake, it was behavior over time, repeated, for as long as he could get away with. Whatever stress / issues he had , does not excuse this behavior. He could have spoken to you if there were issues to discuss, instead of doing this. Please take care of yourself – be around good people, friends, family, maybe look up a councellor in your area for yourself. (he certainly needs to see someone too ) And please put the idea of black magic out of your mind – these were choices, by a grown adult. I am really sending you a hug – be good to yourself, and do what makes you happy in your heart. We all deserve peace and happiness. Love,
Barbs
- This reply was modified 10 years ago by Joseph Long .
Remember, witchcraft is diverse and deeply personal to each practitioner. So, it's crucial to utilize these eBooks as tools for developing a well-rounded understanding, but also to approach the subject with your own unique perspective and intuition. Keep in mind that while some free eBooks might be a good starting point, it's also worth exploring reputable sources, joining online communities, or seeking guidance from experienced practitioners if you wish to pursue a deeper understanding of witchcraft. So, if you find the idea of a free witchcraft eBook intriguing, why not delve into the world of witchcraft and discover its myriad of practices and beliefs? It might just be a step towards uncovering a whole new realm of self-discovery and empowerment. Happy exploring!.
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